Quiet Times Search

The truth transforms us

Spiritual growth is the process of replacing lies with truth

Everything around you exists because "God said so"
Job - I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread (Job 23:12)

Must accept the Bible's authority

• Compass to be relyed on
• Counsel to listen to
• Benchmark for evaluating

Unrealiable authorities (at the Garden of Eden as well):

• Culture - "everyone is doing it"
• Tradition - "we' ve always done it"
• Reason - "it seems logical"
• Emotion - "it just feels right"

Must assimilate its truth

Allow yourself to be transformed by the truth

1. Receive God's Word - Consider carefully how you listen - Luke 8:18
2. Read God's Word - Read it as long as we live - Deuteronomy 17:19
3. Research God's Word  - Write down insights, ask questions
4. Remebering God's Word - Remember what is important to you; memorize; resist tempation
5. Reflect on God's Word  - Meditate, focused thinking

Must apply it principles

• We can fool ourselves that studying is doing
• Applying the Word is hard work
• Alway good to write down an action step from the result of your studying
  • Personal (involves you)
  • Practical (can be done)
  • Provable (deadline)

• God teaches love by putting unloving people around us
• God teaches peace by allowing times of chaos and confusion

1. Satan identifies a desire within you - Comes from within - Mark 7:21-23
2. Satan tries to get you doubt what God has said about sin - Don't let your doubt turn you from God - Hebrews 3:12
   
3. Satan tries replace truth with lies - He is the Father of lies - John 8:44
4. Our disobedience - Drawn away and trapped by our own desires - James 1:14-16

There is always a way out
He will not permit any temptation that you could not overcome - 1 Corinthians 10:13

Refocus attention on something else

By resisting, you actually reinforce it
Don't fight the though, change the channel
Power of suggestion - the more you think about something, the stronger it takes hold of you
Temptation begins by capturing your attention - Satan can't get your attention when you are focused on something else

Reveal your struggle to a gold friend or support group

If you fall, a friend can help you up - Eccelesiastes 4:9-10
Hiding your hurt intensifies it
Satan wants you to think that your temptation is unique - We all fight the same temptations - 1 Corinthians 10:13
The reason we hide our faults is pride - everything is under control

Resist the Devil

He will flee when you resist - James 4:7
Without Christ we are defenseless against the Devil
Satan can not make you do anything, he can only suggest
Use the Word of God as your weapon against Satan - Jesus simply answered Satan with scriptures
Don't ever try to argue with Satan - he better at it

Realize your vulnerabilities

The heart is deceitful above all things- Jeremiah 17:9

Don't carelessly place yourself in tempting situations, avoid them - Proverbs 14:16

• When am I most tempted?
• Where am I most tempted?
• Who is with me went I am tempted?

1. We are slow learners - Israelites are a great example of this
2. We have a lot to unlearn (bad habits) - Taking off the old self and putting on the new self - Romans 13:12 

• We can not grow without a humble, teachable attitude

3. Growth is often painful and scary

• There is no growth without change
• There is no change without fear or loss
• There is no loss without pain
• Must let go of old ways in order to experience the new way

4. Habits take time to develop - Practice and devote yourself to growth - 1 Timothy 4:15
   

• Average person possesses from 500 to 700 different skills and abilities
• Brain can store 100 trillion facts
• Can handle 15,000 decisions a second
  

Begin by assessing your gifts and talents

Take a long honest look at what you are good at
Try to have a sane estimate of your abilities - Romans 12:3
Make a list and ask other people

Experiment with different areas of service
When it doesn't not work out, call it an "experiment", not a failure

Consider your heart and personality
Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given - Galatians 6:4

Examine your experiences and extract lessons you have learned

Remember today what you have learned about the Lord - Deuteronomy 11:2
Forgotten experiences are worthless
Paul - "Were all your experiences wasted? I hope not! - Galatians 3:4

Were rarely see God's good purpose - John 13:7

Run with patience the particular race that God has set before us - Hebrews 12:1

Satan can steal our joy by:

1. Compare your ministry with others - others doing a better job
2. Conform your ministry to the expectations of others - you are doing better and you full of pride

Avoid comparisons, resist exaggerations, and seek only God's commendations - 1 Corinthians 10:12-18

We server God by serving others
Everyone wants to lead; not many want to follow - we would rather be generals than privates

How can you know if you have the heart of Jesus?
You can tell what they are by what they do - Matthew 7:16

Real Servants make themselves available to serve

Like a soldier, always by for duty - 2 Timothy 2:4

• Do what is needed
• Do it when it is inconvenient
• Gives up control of their schedule
• Not frustrated because it is whatever God wants

Real servants pay attention to needs

Always looking out for ways to help others
Great opportunities to serve never last for long
Never tell your neighbor to wait until tomorrow if you can help them now - Proverbs 3:28

Real servants do their best with what they have

Servant never make excuses, procratinate, wait for better circumstances
If you wait for the perfect conditions, you will never get anything done - Ecclesiates 11:4
Less-than-perfect service is better than the best intention

Real servants do every task with equal dedication

Whatever you do, do it with all your heart - Colossians 3:23
You are never too [fill in the blank] to be a servant
Jesus specialized in menial tasks:

• washing feet
• helping children
• fixing breakfast
• servng lepers

Small taks often show a big heart
Little things determine big things
Race to be a leaders is crowded but the field is wide open for those willing to be servants

Real servants are faithful to their ministry

Servants finish tasks, fullfill their responsibilities, and complete their commitments
Can you be counted on by others?
We want to God to say, "Well gone, good and faithful servant" - Matthew 25:23

Real Servants maintain a low profile

Put on the apron of humility, to serve one another - 1 Peter 5:5
Not about show  - If we are trying to please men (including ourselves) we can not be a servant of Christ - Galatians 1:10

Servants are content with quietly serving in the shadows
Wouldn't find many true servants in any Halls of Fame or Who's who books

Be confident that nothing you do for God is a waste of time or effort - 1 Corinthians 15:58

Service starts in the mind

Servants think more about others than about themselves

Not thinking less of ourselves, thinking of ourselves less
Forget yourselves; lend a helping a hand - Philippians 2:4
This is what it means to "lose your life"
Jesus emptied himself; taking the form of a servant - Philippians 2:7

Self-denial is the core of servanthood
Unfair situation; use the occasion to practice the servant life - Matthew 5:41

Servants think like stewards, not owners

Remember the God owns it all
No servant can serve two masters - Money not "should not", "can not"
If you have been trusted with the world's weath, than you can be trusted with true riches - Luke 16:11

Servants think about their work, not what others are doing

They do not compare, criticize, or compete with other servants; same goal and same team
When you are busy serving, you don't have time to be critical
Our job is not to evaluate - Lord will determine the sucessfulness  of his servant - Romans 14:4

If you serve like Jesus, expect to be criticized
The service of the sinful (pouring perfume on Jesus) was though to be a waste but just though of it as significant - Matthew 26:10

Servants base their identity in Christ

They are loved and accepted by grace, servants don't have to prove their worth
Jesus washing feet - Jesus understood his worth and the task did not threathen his self-image - John 13:3-4

Insecure people are always worrying about how they appear; want others to serve them instead
Only God's approval counts - 2 Corinthians 10:18

Servants think of ministry as an opportunity, not an obligation

Serve the Lord with gladness - Psalms 100:2
The Father rewards anyone who serves him - John 12:26
He will not forget how hard you have worked - Hebrews 6:10

The only really happy people are those who have learned to serve

We are naturally drawn to humble people

If people see your strengths but not your weakness, they can not relate

• Strengths: Nice that he can do that but I can not
• Weaknesses: I am not sure how he can do that but if he can then I can with God's power

Decide wheather you want to impress people or influence people

Glory in your weakness

When Satan points out your weakness, agree with him and praise Jesus - 2 Corinthians 12:5
Jesus understans our weakness - Hebrews 4:1
The Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness - Romans 8:26

"If you want to be blessed by God and use you greatly, you must learn to walk with a limp" - Joacb

• You are working with God
• You are representing God

David - "God, teach me lessons for living so I can stay the course" - Psalms 119:33
Solomon - gave us books of Proverbs filled with practical lessons

Here are some questions to help you remember the lesson God has taught us:

1. Taught us through failure
2. Taught us through a lack of money
3. Taught us through pain and sorrow
4. Taught us through waiting
5. Taught us through illness
6. Taught us through disappointment
7. Taught us through people (family, friends, church, critics)

We can feel pain because God feels pain
By his wounds you have been healed - 1 Peter 2:24

Questions:

• Have you loved someone wholeheartedly and they stopped loving you?
• Has someone take advantage of you?
• Have you ever been neglected, forgotten, or rejected?

Amazing grace cost amazing pain

Don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? - James 4:4-5

How does God feel about:

• Lack of trust?
• Sexual sin?
• Lack of care?
• Being pushed aside because of school or business?

• How do you feel about sin? Do you hate it?
  
• Do you allow sin to stay around?

Passover - it meant freedom for the Jews (from Egypt)
Jesus choose Passover to bring freedom to all through his death

It was a new relationship with God and man
God loved mankind but man hurt God with his sin

Jesus: with my life and death, you have a new relationship, now remember this
It will be forgotten in our lives if we don't make plans to remember

In the midst of our activities and pressure of life, we forget:

• How much he went through for us
• That we can be forgiven and start over again and again
• Why we are doing things we are doing

He took bread and gave thanks for this very reason - Luke 22:19

Give thanks and examine yourself - 1 Corinthians 11:28
Don't forget that in Christ there is no condemnation - Romans 8:1

Voluntary surrender is not easy; never comfortable nor enjoyable
Christ can not be formed in us until we are crucified with him - Galatians 2:20 ; Galatians 4:19

Rebellion comes from man's desire to be God
Satan tried to delute the solution to create powerless religions
Our lives do not change at the deepest level and have the same problems as the world

Only when we are sick of our old nature will we be convinced to totally sell out to God
Death to self seems preferable to life

Most of our cires are designed to produce our surrender
Jesus served through suffering - Hebrews 5:8-9
Can not mature without surrender - Hebrews 12:5-11
Many harships come so we enter heaven - Acts 14:22

So how do we go about taking up our cross?

1. Absolutely commited to the concept - John 12:23-25
2. Be committed to prayer about surrender - "I surrender" and "Help my lack of suddender"
3. Be committed to a relationship with another disciple - Share convictions and be open
4. Be committed to stretching your comfort zone - Do things you can not do without his help
5. Realize that surrender brings about absolute freedom - life through death will cease the puzzling paradox

self-denial - decision to consistently lay down our lives - not a popular topic
No one can follow Jesus without it

Jesus' struggle in Gethsemane was fought and won in prayer - Matthew 26:36-46
Without self-denial there would be no cross and no salvation:

• Forgave his tormentors - Luke 23:34
• Ministered to a criminal - Luke 23:34
• Provided for his mother - John 19:27

Any limitation we put on self-denial will surely limit our usefulness to him

Answered the following questions in the Q & A section:

1. Can God be found by those who seek them?
2. Can we call someone a fool or not?
3. Do miracles prove a divine mission?

Sacrifice - we think of pain, suffering, loss, and the uncomfortable concept of denying self
We hear: "Do what feels good"

Sacrifice is a voluntary presentation of ourselves to God to be used for his purposes
Jesus sacrificed his comfortable position with God to serve, heal, love, preach the good news

 We can respond in serveral ways to the sacrifice of Jesus:

• Pretend it never happened
• Can decide to hide from the challenge
• Immerse ourselves in other thoughts
• Stand back with our arms folded
• Understand the facts but no personal acceptance or responsibility

Christ love needs to compel us - 2 Corinthians 5:14-15
Hiding is dishonest. Spectating is hypocritical. Committing is powerful.

What happens when you offer your body as a living sacrifice?

• It produces many seeds - John 12:24-25
• Life truly becomes life
• Our joy is multiplied
• It effects us and other for enternity

What types of sacrifices is God asking of you right now?
Is there is anyone, anything, any place, or any position you are holding on to?

• He entrusted himself to him who judges - 1 Peter 2:23
• Kept his focus on the joy that would be his - Hebrews 12:2

• Connection to the highest places - John 1:11
• His ability to move the masses was unparalleled - Matthew 7:28
• His understanding of what it takes to succeed was clear and unwavering - John 12:23-24
• He stayed on task until it was done - John 19:30

• Working for a promotion
• Earn more money
• Gain material possessions
• Working for the Lord - Colossians 3:23

• Simply save himself and let everyone fend for themselves
• Come down in hope that they would believe
• Settle on improving their lives but not saving them

• Jesus also loved the world that he gave his only life - Love
• He cared deeply for others
• He knew he could bring salvation to many

Jesus came to turn the tables on Satan
He came to deal with the greatest of all questions and fears - death

• He spoke about it in great length - John 5:21-30
• He claimed to be the only solution for death - John 6:53-57
• He raised the dead - John 11
• He believed his death would bring others life - John 12:23-25

When he died, almost everyone thought evil won

Satan pulled out all the stops.
Jesus was in his deadly sights at all times - waiting for a bad day

7 moves to turn the tables:

1. Pray - he is listening - Hebrews 5:7
2. Read - he is speaking - Luke 4:1-13
3. Believe - he is able - Hebrews 2:18
4. Trust - he is willing - Hebrews 4:15
5. Fight - he knows what you can bear - 1 Corinthians 10:13
6. Seek - he has provided a way out - 1 Corinthians 10:13
7. Find - he gives grace in time of need - Hebrews 4:16

• Made himself nothing
• Took the very nature of a servant
• Was made in human likeness
• In the appearance of a man
• Obedient to death

• Consumed with finiding fault with God
• Reject God rather than questioning ourselves
• Thinks he could do a better ob

1. Start with a fresh look at the cross
2. Remind yourself of the humility shown by Christ
3. Want reconciliation more than anything
4. Confess your sin first

• Nothing he cannot do
• No victory he cannot win
• No tragedy he cannot overcome
• No mountain he cannot move

• How did you do that?
• Give us the recipe
• Whisper the secret

Three verse opened a whole new way of understanding Jesus:

• Jesus praying: Abba, Father, everything is possible for you - Mark 14:36
• We can cry Abba, Father  - Romans 8:15
• Because you are sons we can cry Father - Galatians 4:6

Prior to Jesus it was never used as a reference to God; even scandalous if used
Simular to "da-da" in English
Before Jesus, there was no one who could tell us what he could about God

The Cross is enough, then, now, and always

Hebrews 7:25-27

• He is able to completely save
  • Never too short
  • Never too weak
  • Never worn out
• He always lives - Prepared to recuse me until the day I die
• Once for all - One death sufficient for all my sins, for all time

God wants his children to be abolutely confident that we can draw near to him with freedom and assurance

Without seeing the cross, David understood his Savior and Redeemer - Psalms 69:13

We enjoy accomplishment: meeting a deadline, A on a test

Imagine the incredible feeling God must have experienced when he first viewed his own creation:

• Enjoyed developing Israel into a beautiful bride - Ezekiel 16:1-4
• Joyously san through the angels when his Son was born - Luke 2:8-14
• When the church was born - Acts 2

How would iy affect your prayer life if you had a deep conviction that God enjoys his relationship with you?
Sometime I feel like a bother to God, a frustration to him or a source of disappointment

God Enjoys Hearing Us Talking to Him
The longer we are in the Lord, the more secure and real we should be in our prayers
David communicated whatever he felt - God was able to discipline him to be the "man after his own heart"
Do you enjoy the fact that you can be totally real with God?

God Enjoys Watching Us
Parents enjoy children playing soccer, sing in a play, and read the Bible
God is the same way

To truely know him, we must absorb his Word
We must enjoy his talking to us

God's Word was written with one purpose in mind - to communicate God's love:

• He promised to carry our burdens - Matthew 11:28
• We will have all we need - 2 Corinthians 9:8
• He will give us more than we can ask or imagine - Ephesians 3:20
• He will meet all our our needs - Philippians 4:19
• All disciples have angels to server them - Hebrews 1:14

Reading from 2 Kings 6:15-17

We can relate to Elisha's servant, he lacked faith
When we lack faith, we only see the world around us and the challenges that life is throwing at us
When you wallow in faithlessness, your Bible study lack power and your eyes skim the pages without absorbing the words

As Elisha's servant looked down at the Arameans, he turned in despair to Elisha
He admitted that he needed help
Because of his humility, he found the help that he needed

Do you collapse in a heap of self-pity or discouragement?
Do you go out and get the help you need?
Do you babble like a Pharisee or have you gotten gut-level honest with God about how you are feeling?

Elisha's servant got humble and trusted his leader
As he looked out again, he saw the Arameans surrounded by the army of heaven

Problems always look less daunting when you get God in the picture and decide to be full of faith

1. He included people in his prayer struggle
2. He was totally honest with all of his feelings before God and other men - limiting Satan's power - John 3:19-21
3. Jesus stated his preferences to God very clearly
4. Prayed until his surrender was complete - surrender is not completed without this kind of prayer - Philippians 4:6-7

• He knows what is in our hearts
• He knows what we are really seeking
• He knows what we need

• He questioned the wisdom of God's choice
• Argued his lack of eloquence
• Says he does not want the responsibility
• He is honest - he gives God something to work with - Exodus 4:13

• Why do you hide yourself in trouble? - Psalms 10:1-2 - logically does not make sense but this is where David was
• Later, he works it out in prayer (v17) - LORD, you have heard the request of the oppressed; you make them feel secure because you listen to their prayer.

Reasoning with God in prayer is an expression of great faith
The Canaanite woman was one of two times Jesus said someone had "great faith" - Matthew 15:21-28

Persistent widow reasoned with the unjust judge - Luke 18:1-8

We cannot change the eternal purposes of God but we can change his mind on how his purposes will be accomplished

Abraham was a man who reasoned with God - his Son being sacrificed - Genesis 18:23-33

Moses was too - God decided to destroy the disobedient Israelites and start a new nation
Moses gave specifc reasons for not destroying them and God heard him and changed his mind
He prayed with great humility - Numbers 12:3

True humility is the key to the prayer of reason - not telling God what to do
Expressing our outlook and giving reasons to back up our thinking

Mark 1:35, Matthew 14:13, and Luke 4:42 - shows us that Jesus often went to solitary places to pray

Solitude is essential in developing a deep relation ship with God
Be still and know I that I am from God - Psalms 46:10
Do you have a special place where you meet with God?

Psalms 5, 38, and 42 are examples of how open and expressive David was with God
He shared everything from joy and delight to anguish and dispair
How open are you with God?
God wants our hearts
As a result, we are much more open and real with others

We get fired up by sermons, fellowship, and music - Jesus went to be alone
There is nothing in your life that God cannot change

Prayer times make special memories
Israelites setup stones to remind them of what God had done - Joshua 4:7

Ideas for times with God:

• Write a love letter
• Sing a song you composed
• Write on a ballon, let it go
• Hang a poster and write the things God has done

Unless the Lord builds, its builder labor in vain - Psalms 127:1-2
Solomon probably knew the truth of this passage as much as anyone
He saw incrediable tragedy in his own family from the result of his father's unspiritual leadership
His family stands as a warning to all married disciples of how Satan can destroy the most precious of all human relationships

Powerful benefits of daily prayer with one another:

1. Prayer keeps your relationship spiritual focused
2. Prayer keeps us going to bed united - Ephesians 4:26-27
3. Prayer makes us more grateful
4. Prayer gives us focus and direction

Prayer in family life:

1. Nightly prayer with children from infancy
2. Daily devotionals with younger school children - 15min in the morning
3. Taking pray walks with teenage children
4. Quiet Times with one another
5. Praying as a family about major decisions and challenges
6. Praying with children after they are disciplined adds powerfullly to the impact of such training

1. to torment oneself
2. to fret
3. uneasiness or anxiety

• Help me be a better person
• Help me to change
• Help me to love you more

1. Trust - We are exactly the way God wants us to be; he will make up what we are not - 2 Timothy 1:7
2. Righteousness - Righteous are as bold as a lion; god can not hear us if we cherish sin - Psalms 66:18
3. Action - do what the word says; Keep praying until you act

• Physical sickness - Philippians 2:26
• Weak faith - Romans 14:1-2
• Weak conscience - 1 Corinthians 8:11-12

Dads should constantly aware of how how their character impacts their child
But no matter how good we do, we can not fully meet their needs; only the Father can

God is the perfect Father
He is always present and available
He is commited to meeting our physical, emotional, and spiritual needs
No time in our day is more important than the time we spend with Him

YHWH-tsidkenu means "the Lord our righteousness"

Remembering Jesus' name in Hebrew Ya'shua which means  "God is salvation"
He was the fulfillment of the name YHWH-tsidkenu - 1 Corinthians 1:30

Thank God that I had no righteous of my own, Jesus died for me - source of my righteousness

Pause to think about what Christ has done for me
His atoning death and resurrection gives life meaning and significance

• To submit to the will of God
• To please the Father
• To affirm my powerlessness
• To experience His presence
• To know his will
• To be transform (character)
• To become spiritually mature
• To be humble
• To be fruitful
• To walk in the Spirit
• To obey willingly and joyfully
• To receive blessing
• To be protected
• To be useful

There is no greater privilege and responsibility than to pray for our spouse and children
It boggles the imagination to see how the quality of our family life can be affected by exercise this privilege

Powerful spiritual forces of evil try to undermine God's foundational institutions like the family

Bible clearly teaches that our struggle come from the spiritual forces outside conscious perception - Ephesians 6:12
Praying sometimes make things worst (at the beginning) because Satan is on the attack

Each of us need to realize that how we pray for our spouse is limited only by our creativity
If you want the kind of relationship that God intended you to have with your wife, prayer will be a major factor in seeing that desire realized

When we have been faithful in praying for my children, we have a great sense of peace about their lives
Christian dads have a tremendous privilege and a straggering responsibilty to pray their children

• protection
• fruitfulness
• effectiveness
• faithfulness

Should pray for:

• maturity
• commitment
• spiritual health
• impact on our city

Pray for dreams for the church that will stretch our vision for the church and city
God can do more than we can imagine - Ephesians 3:20

How are you praying for your church? - Its your church
What do you want see God do? Where do you want to see His kingdom advance?

The is an infinite number of needs in the world we can pray for

Decide on a series of issues and people you will pray for

Three things to pray for:

1. World hunger
2. World peace
3. World Evangelism
   1. Faithfulness
   2. Power
   3. Effectiveness

Jesus told the disciples that the would be preachedd in all the world and then the end would come - Matthew 24:14

It is important to understand certain principles apply to receiving our daily bread
If we meet God's conditions, we can have confidence that He will provide

1. Need  to have a proper relationship with God - Become a Christian
2. Fellowship with Christ - authentic spiritual communion with Christ
3. Obedience and faithfulness to God's commands

Haggai 1 - we need to consider our ways

• Planted much, but harvested little
• Eat, but never have enough
• Drink, but still thirsty
• Put clothes on, but never warn
• Earn wages only to put them in a purse with holes in it

Because of there repentance, they were rewarded:

• I am with you - Haggai 1:13
• I will bless you - Haggai 2:19
• I will provide for you - Haggai 2:15-19

• Search me
• Know my heart
• Test me
• Know my anxious thoughts
• See if there is any offensive way
• Lead me to the way of everlasting

• God can discern our errors
• Forgive our faults

Sinning is easy; it comes naturally
When we turn our lives to Christ, the Holy Spirit creates a new nature - the two battle within us

Fruits of that new nature - Galatians 5:22-23

Jesus fought the battle with scripture - He said "It is written" many times while responding to others
David hid the God's word in his heart so he would not sin - Psalms 119:11

God promises that we will not be tempted more than we can bear - 1 Corinthains 10:13

• change your life for the better
• put you in a state of relaxed serenity
• help you overcome the nagging undercurrent of guilt
• give you new insight
• let you meet life's challenges with confidence and courage

It is helpful to keep a separate list of needs for times of pure intercession:

• Ministry
• Neighbors
• Family
• Special Needs

Also good to have a "miracle list"

God can do anything - nothing is impossible - Luke 1:37

During difficult times, God extended a seeming impossible invitation:
Jerusalem was under attack from the Babylonians and the city was destroyed

Call to me and I will answer with great and unsearchable things  - Jeremiah 33:3
God promised healing,  forgiveness, and cleansing to Israel - Jeremiah 33:6-9

He can do immeasurably more than what we can ask - Ephesians 3:20

We know God can do anything; we just don't know if he will do them

Love each one

We cannot play favorites with suffering the consequences
Fatal error of Isaac (Genesis 37:4) and Rebekah - Genesis 25:28

Love with your time

It takes time - kids look at time we give them as the most direct expression of our love
Find ourselves always saying, "Not now, I am busy" - then we are too busy
When disciple fought the "Intrusion" of the little ones, Jesus became indignant - Mark 10:13-14
Exclusive time with mom and dad is needed

Kids who are showered with love must be taught to give it away
Otherwise they will become selfish, aloof, and arrogant
God commands us to love hime in return

Love and concern for others should be talked about often
Children learn to love by helping - capable of so much more than we think

We can do far too much for them - creates self-centeredness
They way we treat others is the way we treat Jesus - Matthew 25:34-40

The whole family is an instrument of God - God will use in us is a dark and lost world

Honor you father and mother so it may go well with you - Ephesians 6:2-3

The issue of respecting authority is critical - opposite is arrogant, haughty, cocky attitudes
If not addressed - will lose our children to the world

How can we tell if our chidlren are disrepectful?

• Sassy talk
• Defiant looks
• Temper tantrums
• Stomping feet
• Them hitting you

How can we tell if our oldrer chidlren are disrepectful?

• Slamming doors
• Rolling eyes
• Muttering
• List is endless

Our children honoring us is to show honor to God and his plan
As our children come to respect our authority, they learn to respect God himself

Claim your authority! Expect to respected!
If you not expect it, you will not get it

Children really want deep down inside - the confidence from knowing their limits
They want to know how far they can go

Must have deep convictions and treat it as a serious character (as it is)
Catch it the first time it happens, and deal with it swiftly and powerfully

Lying issues can start at age three

Don't be naive, learn to spot them, and deal with the probelm is terms they understand

Truthful lips endure forever; but a lying tougue last only a moment - Provebs 12:19

First principle = first time obedience

Second principle = Parents never lose
They want to see their limits
Apologize when warrented but never give up in the battle of wills

Sometimes the whole issues comes down to the "mother of all battles"
Compromise is one the most devastating mistakes parent can make
When we do this, we sow the seeds of rebellion - Ephesians 6:4

If you have failed in this area:

1. Read about passages about obeying
2. Talk to them about obeying the first time
3. Explain this has not been the way but will be now
4. Pray together
5. From that time on be different

It starts with 'No'
Sometimes we excuse it by saying, "Well, you'rejust tired"
Shows lack of willpower and fear - compromising ways by raising an isecure, definant, spoiled brat

The key is to break their defiance with crushing their spirit
Be lovingly firm and we can never let them wear us down
Make sure they know it is in their best interest to obey

Tearful, self-pity can drive parents to guilt, rage, and frustration - this is a form of disobedience
This is an attempt by the child to break down the parent - we must not give in
It is a character flaw that one day will produce an unhappy, victim mentality adult

Do everything without complaining of arging - Philippians 2:14-16
This is what God expects from us and we should expect it from our children

• Are they giving their all?
• Are they working hard?

• Don't let your kids do all the work for other
• Don't do all the work for them
• Give allowances apportioned to age, responsibilities, and faithfulness in carrying them out